Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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