it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
