Too much gin, very little bucket
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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