my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
