Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize