Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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