Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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