The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.