if you like me you must not know who I am
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
