It's like God shit irony all over that family
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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