Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
