Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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