I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize
