Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I'm in love with you.

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

huh?

(860): View more from Connecticut

Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.

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(914): View more from New York

Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.

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(360): View more from Washington

Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team

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(615): View more from Tennessee

It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?

(727): View more from Florida

Only if you say it like that.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.

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(775): View more from Nevada

Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends

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