East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
