Your tits are I can't wait for
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
