I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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