I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
