I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
