i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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