I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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