yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
