Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
