It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize