And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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