ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
