Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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