i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize