I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize