is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
false alarm. still invincible.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
