Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

are you still at the devil's house?

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(248): View more from Michigan

sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?

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(714): View more from California

I would go down on you faster than GM stock

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(210): View more from Texas

life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.

(210): View more from Texas

i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".

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(305): View more from Florida

Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.

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(516): View more from New York

we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan

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(772): View more from Florida

The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person

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(618): View more from Illinois

learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.

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