Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
