Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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