Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize