how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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