My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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