You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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