i already hear my dad disowning me
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize