how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
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