He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize