And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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