Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My balls are so social today.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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