i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
