Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
