You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
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I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
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I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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