Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
