I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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