its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Your tits are I can't wait for
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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