Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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