im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm bleeding and have questions
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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