You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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